The first time I laughed after I had lost my father, I stopped abruptly just within a few seconds. I was feeling guilty for being happy about something so soon.
I began to wonder how could I find something amusing enough just weeks after! And, no one made me feel that way. It was my mind all the way.
There was this inner voice decreeing upon me- You are not supposed to laugh so soon. And, I didn’t know how to react to that command.
No one plans for death of a dear one. And, therefore, no one learns how to deal with sudden loss of a loved one unless it happens.
To learn something that tough takes time. Also, given one has to learn it on their own, some may take more time than others
When one loses a dear one, to evolve from the shock is very strenuous. It’s a phase when the dynamics of one’s life are being rapidly rewritten absolutely against their will.
The circumstances turn emotionally dire and enraging. And to be fine and poised about it all is not at all an easy deal.
And, that is why people take so long to get over the death of a dear one- To learn to be okay about it all, while they are not.