While exploring various questions and answers on Quora, I came across a question- “How do I get over the fact that I’m ugly?” I saw it and a smile cropped up on my face instantaneously. The answer to that question lied in my past when I joined College. I sat into my time machine, shut the quantum doors, locked the destination to 11th of August 2014, and Vrooooooooooooom!
I was bald when I joined College. All my hair which made me look so handsome were shaved off. And, no doubt I looked ugly as hell. “People would despise me and avoid my presence”, I thought. And, what could I do? Nothing could make me feel better as I didn’t have any self-regard at all.
But, then I had no other option either. I was new at College and was going to meet so many new people. Some would be rich in certain talents and skills while others would be masterful at others. And, I didn’t wish to be left out. I had to make my presence felt out there. I had to make my mark. After all, the first impression lasts longer than anything else in a person’s head.
So, I asked myself, “What am I good at?” Ostensibly, I came up with this- Nothing! So, then I asked myself again- “What am I fine at?” And, then a few things came to my mind. I was fine at writing and speaking. In fact, being a greenhorn neophyte, I was not bad at either of those traits.
So, I made a commitment to myself-
“While he may impress others with his guitar, and she with her dance, I will showcase my abilities as a writer.
While she makes her mark as a great singer, and he as a masterful sportsman, I will prove my mettle as a good speaker.”
And, I did that. Actually, no. I didn’t. To say that I did achieve those targets would be a big lie. I failed miserably in my own perspective. Although, most others didn’t mind that. Because they could see that at least this guy was making an effort to come ahead of others and be different. And, just that attempt and intent was enough to make me somewhat more appealing to the people around me.
My confidence kept growing day by day. And, with regular practice, I kept getting better. By now I knew that these abilities were my assets- My writing, speaking and articulation skills. So, then I made another commitment to myself-
Albeit my outer demeanor was not an attractive one. But, my efforts to be different and better than the lot were proving wonders for me.
So, I decided to hone my skills and become masterful at them. Being different was simply not enough for me. I had to be simply amazing and the best at whatever I did.
So, I began to participate at every event being organized in my College. Be it literary contests, group discussions, extempore or creative writing contests, I would participate everywhere. I would observe others and try to learn what made them stand apart.
I would watch how other writers tried different ways of writing. I would try to comprehend how the writer got so great at writing in a particular manner. I would try to learn two new words every day to augment my vocabulary.
I would also observe and copy how other good speakers would move and groove. How do they maintain eye contact and keep the entire audience attentive and enthused? How do they move their hands and how would they react when they forget what needs to be said?
I would try to learn from the best I could see around me, and I tried to better my skills with each episode. Next time I would participate in some event, I would try to showcase those lessons. And, this gave my audiences something new to see in me every time. And, this again made me somewhat interesting as a person.
And, finally, after lots of efforts, I did achieve my aim. I did become good at the traits I was fine at. Now if someone would have asked me what am I good at? I knew what I had to say. And, by the time this realization occurred, another very important thing happened to me.
I didn’t care anymore that I was bald. An entire semester was now gone. The hair on my head had only grown a bit. In fact they never really came back in the numbers they were around earlier. But, I simply didn’t care anymore. Why?
Because I had something else in me which made me beautiful and definitely not ugly. It was my confidence. I was bolder than ever, and my looks didn’t matter anymore. I knew how to make my mark felt and that became my greatest source of traction.
I am good at those traits now and my confidence jar is full to the brim. I still have to tread a long path to becoming the best at writing and speaking. But, why am I talking about those, they may make up for a different post.
So, here is what I need to say. One may be short, fat and really bad in looks. But, one can never be awful at everything else for that matter. So, if you are not good at something. Be great at something else. What you lack in one trait, make up for it in some other trait. And, when you do that, your confidence will be the greatest piece of garment others would have ever seen you cladded into. And, then the world around will definitely embrace you.
“You are not ugly. You are just not wearing the best of attire built for you. Search for it, and you shall be the brightest star around!”